How you love yourself is how you teach others to love you. -Rupi Kaur
So, how have others been loving you? It can be a scary thing to think about if the love you have received hasn’t been a true reflection of love. We are talking from the young adult perspective to the mature adult perspective. When you are a child, of course you are not responsible for how love came across to you from your family. But, from young adulthood on out, you teach others how to love you.
How others love you is a reflection of how you love yourself. What you allow others to do, get away with, tells you how you feel about yourself. When you love yourself, beyond outward rewards and self-care practices, you will not allow others to mistreat you. You will not allow others to misuse you. Yes. It happens sometimes. It happens along the journey but, remember all you have to do is to remind yourself of your power and the love you have for yourself.
I practiced telling myself, “I love me, more than I love you.” It took me awhile to believe it and it has gotten me out of some bad relationships and has helped when it came to friendships and family-ships. Yes, I made up that word. It has helped me to draw the line. It has helped me establish boundaries. I wouldn’t treat you like “that” or myself. Therefore, I cannot and will not allow you to treat me like “that”. It has helped me to grow roots to deepen my love for myself. It is very grounding. It is very centering. It helps me to get back on track. It is especially helpful in romantic relationships because it helps you not to lose yourself. It helps you to establish and maintain boundaries. In the beginning, it helped me to learn what was not good for me.
HOW do you love yourself? Really think about the ways in which you speak to yourself. The things you do to yourself. How you feed yourself. How you push away your dreams and goals. How you feel about yourself and your looks. If you don’t feel good about you, it radiates. If you feel good about you, it radiates.
Teach people how to love you by first teaching yourself how to love you!