Fuels To Rise Above and Mature

Rising above things and people (not in a you are better than them type of way) is really about maturing. It’s about growing up as it relates to how you deal with situations and people that seem to have a reoccuring or underlying theme in your life. It could be finances or family relationships. It’s not about being the bigger person, it’s about being the wiser person. I know most of us reading this are adults. But let’s be honest, we all have areas in our lives we need to mature in. I need to mature in my finances. I need to mature in a family dynamic where I have been casting my pearls (wisdom, advice) to the swine (a person that wants to remain in their own filth (ways)). I realize how much time and energy I have wasted in that area. And as I continue to work on my finances, I realize how important knowledge of money management is.

First, handle yourself with grace and love when you think about the areas in which you need to mature. Secondly, be honest about your own behavior, attitude, delivery, morals, values. You must take a long, hard look in the mirror at yourself and not anyone else. Yes, you can consider your past or the other person’s actions but after that, it is your responsibility to take accountability. It is your choice to grow up and to take action. And that is the third thing that fuels us to rise above; action. What do I need to do to change this situation? Habit? Myself because I cannot change and control other people. After you decide to grow up and rise above whatever it is, you need to access and plan and take action. What does that look like?

It looks like you will need more fuel. You will need resources and sources like prayer, meditation, self help books about growth and transformation, therapy, leaning into what your religion may provide about change and maturity. It may take finding a new job or leaving a relationship. It will take TIME AND PRACTICING what you are learning. It could take years to get a handle on some things. You must be patient with yourself. You must not give up and you must have compassion for yourself when you fail. You will have to move from reaction to responsiveness. You will need to become more mindful about what you are thinking and feeling.

An example I now go by thanks to many years of reacting is, “I never make serious decisions when I am not stable.” If I am hungry, angry, anxious, depressed, moody it is not a good time to make a decision on a whim out of frustration. I also try to be aware of my mood when arguments or lively discussions start to take place. I am in no shape to articulate accurately what I am thinking or feeling. Also, if I am in a flare up, not myself, in pain, I try to let people know and I often am quiet or off to myself. It is for all of our protection lol!

It was Steven Covey that said, “You determine your weather.” Not others. Not even your body. I can’t use I am sick and be mean to people. I can’t use I am old ( I am not old yet ha!) and cranky to be mean to people. I can’t use my personal situation and take it on people in public. I can understand it happens sometimes but it should not be used as an excuse to be nasty and mean. You definitely need to mature in that area if you are using it as an excuse. Rise above it. And honestly, I had to. We want people to understand what we are dealing with and excuse our behavior. But ultimately, we are responsible for our weather not others. And it becomes an old excuse quickly.

~Nikki