I’ve learned quite a bit about myself this month and other people. Perhaps, I was made to rest from the beginning of the year through most of the summer because of an extremely challenging last year. And because I would need some strength to work through some things beginning this Autumn season and forward.

Instead of looking at what is before be with dread, I choose to look at it as a project of self-love. However, sometimes I wonder why I do the work only to meet guys (as far as dating) who have not done the work and refuse to do the work. I remind myself that it’s not about ANYONE else. It is about me. A better me creates a better world, a better country, a better community, a better family, a better friend, and eventually a better relationship. Healing me helps me with my soul mission and my purpose, also. It even helps me with my endeavors. After all, I must interact with others. Healing is a process and it’s not linear. I often wonder how people have so much time to consume themselves with other people’s lives. There is so much to work on within and if we were doing what we are supposed to be doing on the earth, how would you have time to manage/overly criticize/rebuke other people’s lives/journey? I digress.

I know now more than ever what I don’t want but, it’s time to pay more attention to what I do want. And even with that, not too much focus on what I do want. Too much focus on what you want can put you into a space that constantly reminds you of what you don’t have yet. And being reminded of that daily or too often can create sadness, anxiety, depression, and even bitterness. GRATITUDE can bring you back centered and going on with your life, dreams, and goals with action can keep you moving forward. Tomorrow brings a new 31 days for me and if you have read this far, it’s going to be OPEN OCTOBER as my “theme”.

~Nikki