I woke up at 1:27 this morning. I was fully refreshed because I fell asleep a few hours before my normal bedtime. I scrolled Facebook, and eventually got up to have a low carb breakfast because I was incredibly hungry. I figured after I go back to sleep and get up for the day, I would have coffee and cereal. Anyway, I was heading from the kitchen when I was suddenly struck by a painful memory of childhood.
Where did the thought come from? Well, I have recently been going through some things with my own young adult daughter and I guess I was reflecting on motherhood and how some of the things said and done to me affected my life. I am careful not to injure my daughter with deeds or words but, as I have been told by other parents, “Good luck with that.” No matter how hard you try to be the best or the perfect parent, not to do what was done to you, they will find something you didn’t do right and you will be made aware of it. Over and over. I have already been made aware. “Luckily” it wasn’t life alternating.
I think childhood injuries that take a toll on us mentally and emotionally have to be a constant of microaggression, aggression, abuse of any level, or some devastating trauma. But, even if it’s not childhood, it can be young adulthood and adulthood. I think about the things that happened to me in young adulthood and in adulthood that were done by someone to me. And I ask this question, not for you to answer. Not for you to feel bad about yourself but, for you to think about your words and actions. Have you been the cause of someone’s life long suffering?
I pondered how would one deal with that? Ask for forgiveness? What if you don’t get it? Then you have to forgive yourself and move on. Change? Yes. Please change. I don’t care how old you are. Change is ageless. You’re not a dog so you can learn new ways and habits.