Have you ever gone on a vacation or a 3 day get away and returned saying, “Well, back to reality.” And you really felt the dread of returning back to your life, your job. Oh, you were glad you made it back home safely. You may have been happy to be greeted by your pet and family. But, you dread the return of the day to day life as you know it. Honestly, I have been there and I have said it, too. I remember reading this quote that said, “Create a life you don’t have to escape or go on vacation from” and the quote really annoyed me. Why? I guess because there was some truth to it. However, I still want to travel and I still believe there is value in getting away from the routine of life.

So, as I was returning home last week, I felt the sadness of having to leave the vacation condo we rented. I felt grateful when I pulled into my driveway, “Home at last. Safe and sound” but, the reality of my life was waiting for me. Back to dealing with grief. Back to struggling financially (but getting better). Back to caregiving and mediating between the terrible marriage of my parents. Back without my right hand to help, my brother Bobby that passed away. Back to thinking about what’s next and am I next to lead God’s people. WOO! That really scares me!

I started to wonder, what if I created a life that I didn’t feel like I needed to escape? Or at least, not escape so much? Most of my travel is never about escaping it’s about exploring. But when I return home, I wonder what it would be like to return to a job you enjoy and an environment that isn’t so heavy with the cares of this world or my world to be exact. What if I had others filling in and picking up where my brother left off? What if I had parents whose marriage was solid and good and mostly peaceful? Oh, how that would make my life so much easier! What if I was the best selling author, fashionista, modern day artist, podcasting, spiritual guide I wanted to be? How would coming home feel? Oh, to be able to say, “Oh, joy! Back to the life!” and to say it with joy. Yeah, I want that.

~Nikki