People with Rheumatoid Arthritis Disease need support from family and friends. And you know what makes you a more supportive spouse, family member, friend? If you would take the time to EDUCATE yourself about Rheumatoid Arthritis Diseases from a credible source or go to a doctors visit with your loved one. You can research ways to be supportive to a person with RAD. Or here is a shocker, as them what do they need you to do? Or are you afraid that you may actually be asked to do something? I have found this to be a reality for some. But that is not the person who is ill problem, it’s the person who says they care character or heart problem. I think what most people with RAD wants is for you to understand and for you to care. They want to be believed! They want you to know it’s not some minor joint pain. It is much more than that and you would know that if you would EDUCATE yourself.

Whew!

Now, for those of us with RAD there are numerous online groups you could join for support. There ae forums like “Patients Like Me” that have groups for all types of health issues under the sun. There may be local RAD or Chronic Pain groups or you could take the initiative and start one. I highly recommend therapy. It can help you process what you are going through and they many changes your life take on. It can help you deal with unsupportive family, jobs, and friends. Staying sane is a challenge with any illness or disease and it is made worse when you don’t have people around you who support you or care about you.

And last but not least, you may have to become bold enough to support yourself. You may have to be like, “I don’t care if you believe me. My doctor believes me. I believe me. Others who have this believe me.” No, we don’t use it as an excuse to “get out of responsibilities”. That is a person who wants everyone to cater to them and this is a selfish and unhealthy mentality. Do all you can for yourself. But when you need help, you need help. Our illness is not predictable. We don’t know how we will feel when we wake up, in the middle of the day, or at the end of the day. We don’t know from hour to hour. We don’t know if it will be mild, moderate or severe. We learn to roll with the punches.

I can have every intention on showing up to your birthday dinner but, if my pain is a 7 out of 10 I may not be there. If I have been dealing with pain all week and working, and by the time the weekend comes I am fatigued (dead tired) and flaring, I won’t make it. Unless there is an RSVP that will cost you or it’s a wedding, I will not drag myself to it. But, I have. It just depends on what I can sacrifice and most of us are sacrificing our body and mind to arrive and put on our celebration faces. We don’t want to ruin the atmosphere. We don’t want to talk about our pain. We are there to celebrate or enjoy the event. We want to be present and silently think, “I can’t wait to get home, soak in epsom salt, and take a pain med and go to sleep!” Instead, we carry on.

~Nikki ((soft hugs to warriors))