Sunday Morning Coffee Musings: I Think About Giving Up, Sometimes

Today is that sometimes. We all feel like giving up or have felt like giving in the past. If we are honest, there are some things we did give up on and maybe even ourselves from time to time. If you have been following this blog you know I’ve had my issues with the church and religion and at times with God. Let me back up…

It was an extraordinary week as I was in classes in Jackson, Mississippi learning about God’s Pattern for Leadership and Strategic Planning: Analysis, Needs Assessments, Objectives and Goals. I like to learn. I had very little anxiety while I was there. I know it was because I had very little responsibilities. I didn’t have to cook. I didn’t have to clean. I didn’t have to worry much. I returned home Friday and Saturday evening I partied with my friend and her family at a 1990’s themed house party. If I had more photo space, I’d share the jeans I created. I had a ball. I danced all night and today I can barely move. It’s not just age, it’s Rheumatoid Arthritis and Fibromyalgia on top of that.

What I feel like giving up on today is church. It’s funny because I was so sure of my direction all week. Well, not really but, I am sure it involved the church. Make sure you understand I said nothing about giving up on God. I know I am feeling this because of the conversation I had with a particular individual and after finding out they lied and twisted a conversation we had. This person actually is a pastor I know very well.

This thing I am feeling is temporary. I just wanted to acknowledge that I feel like giving up and it’s not an indication that I will. I think it’s important to acknowledge a feeling and to sit with it. To explore it. To receive what it is telling you or teaching you or where it is leading you. I hope you know that it’s okay to FEEL like giving up sometimes and sometimes there are things we should give up but, never give up on yourself.

~Nikki