As we near towards the end of March and Women’s History Month, I think about all of the women that have made history that we know about and all of the many women that make history and a difference in their communities we will never know about. In a world, and especially in countries and cultures where women are often thought of as second-hand citizens, and in America and other countries, once were (still are) considered property, what is the value of a woman? Studies done by men in the past determining the intelligence and the emotional dissecting of a woman were nearly always biased and harsh. Even in religious texts women were treated poorly. Yet, I could never understand how you could be religious and treat another human being poorly. That’s another topic for another day.
A woman’s worth is priceless. Invaluable. Yet we, even women, continue to devalue women based on economics, social status, race, religion, bodies, and lifestyle. A woman has proven over and over again her value to this world and some women of color have to prove to other women the same thing those women are trying to prove to men. In my opinion, you can’t want equal pay and rights for women of your race and religion only. Either fight for ALL women or take some time to work on your inner self to find out why you don’t want to share your victories with ALL women. Resolve that conflict. If women are to move forward and to make more history, it has to be done in unity. In unity, there is power. In division, there are weak spots.
Given the enormous success of Everything Everywhere All at Once at the Oscars, you could easily be forgiven for missing one of the night’s other significant and memorable moments for women.
The ceremony also saw costume designer Ruth E. Carter become the first Black woman in history to win two Academy Awards.
Four years after winning Best Costume Design for Marvel’s Black Panther, she took home her second honour in the category for its sequel, Black Panther: Wakanda Forever.
As lead costume designer, Carter played a crucial role in making the film a cultural phenomenon with her garments helping to bring the fictional country of Wakanda to life.
Here is a partial article about the history of black women in costume design by Shelby Ivey Christie. Link at the bottom for complete article.
Until the late 1950s, black actors appeared on screen mostly as slaves or domestic workers, leaving little room for creative costuming. Hattie McDaniel’s Oscar-winning role as Mammy in 1938’s Gone with the Wind is a prime example of this kind of caricature casting; her wardrobe was marked by a house dress, an apron, and a headscarf. Similarly, when James Baskett appeared as a plantation worker named Remus in 1946’s Song of the South—a role he won an honorary Academy Award for—he did so in the type of plain, tattered pieces synonymous with poor blacks at the time.
1957: Carmen Jones
“I’d have to say my favorite costume moment is Carmen Jones,” shares Stacey Beverly, a Hollywood costume designer who’s worked on Girlfriends, The Game, and Black-ish, among other projects. The 1957 classic stars Dorothy Dandridge as Carmen Jones, a factory worker who, outside of her blue-collar job, wears a now-famous look: a curve-hugging red pencil skirt and black off-the-shoulder top. This was significant—not only were audiences seeing a black woman portrayed outside of a domestic role, but that black woman was also the epitome of glamour, dressed in luxe fur coats, dresses cinched at the waist, and hoops (gold hoops, to be specific, which were not de rigueur in 1957). Dandridge made history as the first black woman nominated for a Best Actress Academy Award, and while she didn’t win, her portrayal of Jones did succeed in sending an empowering message to scores of black women.
1966–1968: Batman and Julia
In 1966 Eartha Kitt was cast as Catwoman in Batman—a role that saw her costumed in a tight leather catsuit and mask, bringing the sex appeal and allure of black women onto the small screen. Two years later, when Diahann Carroll became the first black woman to star in a TV series by landing the title role in Julia, the milestone was also a seminal moment for black costume design. A widowed single mother—which many black women could relate to, as the U.S. had entered the Vietnam War three years prior—Julia had an impeccable wardrobe reflective of the times. As the ’60s ushered in a fashion awakening that saw a departure from classic A-line silhouettes and an embrace of mod styles, Julia was costumed in swing dresses, paisley prints, and leisure suits; her hair was worn in the short, asymmetrical cut popularized by Vidal Sassoon, and she completed her looks with round-toe shoes and nude lipstick. Black women finally saw themselves as active participants in American pop culture and trends. They weren’t just the women who scrubbed the floors and burped the babies, they were now professionals, earning their own money and curating trendy wardrobes. Mattel partnered with Carroll to create a Julia Barbie, and in 1969 Carroll won a Golden Globe for the role.
I love fashion and I wanted to be a fashion designer growing up. It was the only dream I had had for a very long time. It still burns within me. I like anything that involves clothing. However, costume design in on another level of creativity and imagination to me.
I know you are probably thinking you haven’t made history as a woman but, oh yes you have! You are making history in your own life that will become HER-STORY. You don’t have to be famous or to break a glass ceiling. You just have to look back over your life and see all that you have overcame. You just have to look forward and think about what’s next and plan it out. We all have a story to tell and stories that are forming as long as we are living. Why do you think the elders in our lives have so much to talk to us about? How do you think they gained so much wisdom? Our mothers, sisters, aunties, cousins, coworkers have HER-STORIES.
Tell me something you have overcome! Or share something you have done or do in your community!
Affectionately called “R.B.G.” by her supporters, Ruth Bader Ginsburg has inspired generations of women to break gender barriers. Even after facing gender discrimination as she pursued her academic goals, Ginsburg forged ahead and became the second woman–and first Jewish woman–to serve on the Supreme Court.
Ruth Bader Ginsburg was born on March 15, 1933 in Brooklyn, New York. Born to a Jewish family, her father Nathan Bader immigrated to the United States, while her mother Celia Amster Bader was a native of New York. Ginsburg’s family valued education and instilled in her a love of learning.
After graduating from Cornell, Ginsburg subsequently started attending Harvard Law School. While at Harvard, Ginsburg was one of only 9 women in a class of 500 students. She often faced gender discrimination and was asked to explain how she felt about taking a spot in the program instead of a man. Ginsburg and her female colleagues were called on in class for “comic relief” and they were even excluded from using certain sections of the library. Ginsburg transferred to Columbia Law School in 1958 for her final year. During her studies, she made both the Harvard and Columbia Law Review. Ginsburg graduated with her law degree from Columbia in 1959 at the top of her class. However, even with all of her academic accomplishments, it was hard for her to find employment after graduation. She explained, “In the fifties, the traditional law firms were just beginning to turn around on hiring Jews. … But to be a woman, a Jew, and a mother to boot, that combination was a bit much.”[1] Ginsburg was able to land a position as a law clerk for the Honorable Edmund L. Palmieri, Judge of the United States District Court for the Southern District of New York in 1959. She served in that office until 1961.
Ginsburg was appointed to the United States Court of Appeals for the District of Columbia Circuit in 1980 by President Jimmy Carter. She served there for thirteen years, prior to being nominated as an Associate Justice of the Supreme Court by President Bill Clinton in 1993. She accepted his nomination and took her seat as a Supreme Court Justice on August 10, 1993. She became the second woman, and first Jewish woman, to serve on the Supreme Court. During her tenure as a justice, Ginsburg has fiercely advocated for gender equality and women’s rights. For example, she wrote the court’s opinion in the United States v. Virginia case, ruling that qualified women could not be denied admission to the Virginia Military Institute. She was also a voice of dissent to the court’s decision in the Ledbetter v. Goodyear Tire & Rubber Co. case, denying a woman’s gender pay discrimination claim. Ginsburg subsequently worked with President Barack Obama in 2009 on the Lilly Ledbetter Fair Pay Act to combat pay disparities. At eighty-seven years old, Ginsburg continued to work for gender equality as a Supreme Court Justice.
Ginsburg died on September 18, 2020 due to complications of metastatic pancreas cancer.
Yolande Cornelia “Nikki” Giovanni Jr.[1][2] (born June 7, 1943) is an American poet, writer, commentator, activist, and educator. One of the world’s most well-known African-American poets,[2] her work includes poetry anthologies, poetry recordings, and nonfiction essays, and covers topics ranging from race and social issues to children’s literature. She has won numerous awards, including the Langston Hughes Medal and the NAACP Image Award. She has been nominated for a Grammy Award for her poetry album, The Nikki Giovanni Poetry Collection. Additionally, she has been named as one of Oprah Winfrey‘s 25 “Living Legends”.[2]
Giovanni gained initial fame in the late 1960s as one of the foremost authors of the Black Arts Movement. Influenced by the Civil Rights Movement and Black Power Movement of the period, her early work provides a strong, militant African-American perspective, leading one writer to dub her the “Poet of the Black Revolution”.[2] During the 1970s, she began writing children’s literature, and co-founded a publishing company, NikTom Ltd, to provide an outlet for other African-American women writers. Over subsequent decades, her works discussed social issues, human relationships, and hip hop. Poems such as “Knoxville, Tennessee” and “Nikki-Rosa” have been frequently re-published in anthologies and other collections.[3]
Giovanni has received numerous awards and holds 27 honorary degrees from various colleges and universities. She has also been given the key to over two dozen cities. Giovanni has been honored with the NAACP Image Award seven times. One of her more unique honors was having a South America bat species, Micronycteris giovanniae, named after her in 2007.[4]
Giovanni is proud of her Appalachian roots and works to change the way the world views Appalachians and Affrilachians.[5]
I was able to witness via television Nikki Giovanni receiving a Grammy for her album, The Nikki Giovanni Poetry Collection. I thought it was amazing to see a poet (a poet!) winning a Grammy. When I look at her being MORE than a poet, that is what inspires me.
I was going to post about something else but this has been on my mind as so many people struggle with sacrificing themselves for things or people they were never called to sacrifice for. They seem to be sacrificing their happiness, their joy, their lives, their freedom, and destiny for things that depreciate quickly and for people whom obviously do not deserve the sacrifices.
I see how this self-sacrifice is related to Inner Work. Some are making sacrifices and are YET unaware they are not getting anything or much in return. They have not discovered what the empty feeling on the inside means. They have not experienced frustration. Oh, but when they come into awareness of the unbalance, they will face a choice. A choice to stop it or to continue doing the same things hoping for different results.
Others self-sacrifice because it’s something they have done their entire lives. Putting other people’s wants and needs ahead of their own. It may have started in childhood by putting parents’ wants and desires ahead to please them. Yet, unhappy in the family business or as a doctor. Maybe it started when they became a parent and now it flows into the role of husband or wife. It flows into the job. Making sacrifices and even volunteering to stay over so much people expect it of you. “But you always stay over. You always change shifts with me.” The moment you can’t, it’s a problem and you’re being selfish. I know you may have heard that before. Things like, you’re a wife now or husband now and you must sacrifice your happiness, needs, wants, dreams, and desires. It’s the “godly” thing to do. The honorable thing. All the while you are miserable as hell. And Hell is pretty miserable.
Then there is the one that “saves the day”. You’ve been saving the day since you were young. Maybe you were the older sibling or the most dependable one. You drop what you are doing to “save the day”. You had something planned but dare not tell your mom or pops you will have to take them tomorrow if it’s not urgent. You must save the day. You’re the good one. Everyone wants to borrow money from you. You stay in relationships you know you should have been left but, you can’t let the other person down even if they are letting you down. You need to be the hero because you need validation that you are worthy of their love. You need to be needed even if it makes you sad.
Unauthorized sacrifices can wear you down, out, and take you out of this realm. It can have you living outwardly or secretly a life of misery. We do have to make some authorized sacrifices in life. Most sacrifices are not pleasant. However, I want you to think of this scripture from the Bible, “Obedience in greater than sacrifice.” If you obey, you don’t need to sacrifice. King Saul of Israel disobeyed God’s command. He thought that by altering God’s command, he somehow developed a better solution than what God had outlined. This is the context for the statement “obedience is better than sacrifice” spoken by the Prophet Samuel.
If you obey the soul, the Spirit, God, your spirit, your gut feeling then you would not have to make unauthorized sacrifices. I have sacrificed for people and they have been ungrateful and in return I would get angry. God never told me to do those things. I was conditioned to do those things trying to get something that was not there. Or trying to look like the best employee to receive the position or trying to “save the day” and make everyone happy at the expense of my own happiness. I don’t believe God has called us to this type of sacrificing. There is no way you can convince me that a loving God would call you to a life of unhappiness by the way of unauthorized and habitual self-sacrifice. Be obedient to the soft spoken, “Stop. Leave. Do not say yes. It’s okay to lose this friendship. It’s okay to back out of this relationship. You’ve sacrificed for your children. Now go and do you.” Be obedient to the “something” saying to you, “You need therapy. You need to listen to your quiet inner voice. You need to listen to how your body feels when you agree to these things. The anger. The sadness. The loneliness.” I mean if God didn’t join (or there is no divine connection) the relationship, marriage, friendship, or job then you don’t have to remain when it’s time to depart. Everything has a season, a reason, a lesson, and a lifetime. Locate yourself in these unauthorized sacrifices.
You were born to be real, not to be perfect. -Unknown
The process of deepening the roots of self-love will not require you to be perfect. It will require you to be real. As the quote expresses, you were born to be real. Real means you are just as human as you are divine. In your human form you will always make mistakes. We have discussed forgiving yourself on this self-love journey. You’re going to need to do that often because there will be trial and error. Sometimes you will come out on top and sometimes you will not but, each time you will learn and grow. To learn and to grow is the VICTORY!
So, remember, you are real. Not perfect. No pressure.
What is mental health? Mental health includes our emotional, psychological, and social well-being. It affects how we think, feel, and act. It also helps determine how we handle stress, relate to others, and make healthy choices. Mental health is important at every stage of life, from childhood and adolescence through adulthood.
Let’s lift this out of the first paragraph, “It affects how we think, feel, and act.” If your mental health is not in check, it will affect the way you think and feel about yourself. It will affect the actions you take concerning yourself. Yes, it will affect others, too, but today we are talking about you and self-love. When you don’t take care of your mental health you may not be able to see yourself through the correct lenses. You may not make the best decisions for yourself. I know from personal experiences.
Mental health challenges distort the truth. It distorts facts. When I am challenged with anxiety, I have to first realize that I am anxious. I am anxious about my current situation or the future. I have to tell myself; I can’t trust anything I am thinking and saying right now because I am feeling anxious. It’s not until I start to build the momentum to pull myself out of anxiety or depression that I can trust what I am thinking and feeling. Feelings pass. “Thoughts” can change. It is especially important to remember that when you are going through something that affects your mental health. A loss of a family member, being fired from your job, the breakup of a relationship or mental illness.
Taking care of your mental health or mental illness is pertinent to your overall health but, it also is a sign of loving yourself enough to deal with the mental issues you have. You must be brave to face the facts. You must be even braver, to take the step to talk to your doctor and to seek out a mental health professional. It’s wonderful to pray about it but, your breakthrough comes when you accept the help available to you. For the super religious, God created therapist and psychologist. There is one of your race and culture and religion. AND God loves them and approves them just as much as he loves and approves you and primary care physician. They are walking in their calling, too. They are anointed, too.
So, my love, take care of your mental health. If you want to show yourself that you love yourself, take that step. I’m with you all the way.
Nikki's Confetti Life 