Self Injection of Truth Serum: The Antidote to Lies

The Divergent Series #nsurgent Movie review! We have lots of thoughts ___

When I was dating, in and out of relationships, I discovered men lie in the worst ways. Men lie and I believed the lies because well, at first I didn’t have a clue. When you’re young and you have no coaching on what to expect in the dating world, the “games” and how to protect your heart, you’re just out there on your own without sound or solid advice from people you can trust. And you end up hurt, used, and abused. Heartbreaks keep on coming like a bottomless beverage. Until you’ve had enough. Until you wise up. You learn quickly (well, that can be subject to the individual because I didn’t!) but I learned that lies flow easily from the lips of deceitful men to get whatever they want. I learned charm is a spell. Literally. And dangerous in the skilful hands of a liar.
You also learn the FEEL of a lie, the TASTE of a lie, the TOUCH of a lie, the SOUND of a lie, and the LOOK of a lie. But what do many of us do, male and female? We pretend we don’t feel, taste, hear or see any of it. And you know what you’re now doing now??? Lying to yourself.

Truth Serum - Chuck Wiki

If you want to end a brigade of lies brought to your doorstep by others like their delivering roses when they are really dumping manure at your feet, the first step is to admit to the hypocrisy. What!!!??? Yes. The reason others can constantly lie to you is because you lie to you. After some time in the dating world, you FEEL, SEE, HEAR, TASTE, KNOW a lie but you PRETEND you don’t. You talk yourself out of it and around it and you you let it slide. You solicit the counsel of friends and wise ones but if they tell you what you don’t want to hear, you override the truth and go with the lies and excuses you tell yourself. ADDRESS THE HYPOCRISY.

One you prep yourself with the alcohol swab of admitting to hypocrisy, then inject yourself with the TRUTH ABOUT YOU. Oh I know you thought this would be about stopping the lies you allow others to tell you but here is the TRUTH about TRUTH serum, it begins with you. That’s how you know it’s working. Tell yourself the easy truth and the hard cold gut wrenching truth about you, every time, every chance and it won’t be nearly as hard to accept the truth when you are being lied to.

Let me be clear. If you want honesty be honest with yourself even when it is not pretty, not convenient and not what you want to hear. It is what you need. Becoming honest with myself about myself help me to accept the truth about the lies presented to me. It no longer mattered what I wanted, what he looked like, how long we had been together, it was what it was. When you stop pretending with yourself, you’ll stop pretending with others.

~Nikki

“Self truth is the antidote to lies.”-Nicole Jackson

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Triggers are Traps

Bible Verses on Change- Romans 12_2- Renewing Your Mind _ Darrell ___

I know you’ve heard it before. Change in behavior only comes when you change your mind about the behavior. It takes 21 days to develop a new habit. All of that is true but, 21 days won’t become forever until the mind has been transformed and it will not come easy. That is where I believe we get stuck. When the going gets tough. What do we do when we are trying to break a habit when the going gets tough? Do we push through or give up and go back to our old ways?

I think one of the keys to changing bad habits is to know what triggers the bad habit and to have a plan in place for when those triggers go off. In other words, being prepared. It takes practice to connect the triggers and saying to yourself okay, I SEE that THIS  is happening, what do I do next? Do I grab my cigarettes? Do I reach for ice cream and lose myself in it? Do I scream and curse? If you don’t know what to do next you do what is familiar.

So often when we plan to change we don’t have safety nets out there to catch us or help us not to fall back into the trap of old ways and habits. In the process of renewing the habits of the mind, we need more than a mantra, we need a detailed plan. Hopefully, this will help us the next time we are in the middle of change and life pulls a trigger we can recognize it and disarm it with a new response. And perhaps our new response will become our new way of dealing with triggers and rid them null and void once and for all.

~NikkiChanges picture quotes - Life changing sayings with image - Change ___

 

HYSTERICALLY, YOURS TRULY

 

The Spirit can not speak to you when you’re hysterical. If you’re acting crazed or frantic, in the movies they would slap you back into reality. (I always wanted to be in that scene so I could say “Get a grip” while shaking the person). Hysteria is beyond a slap or reasoning. You’re not hanging on the cliff of your thoughts. You’ve let go. Your thoughts are now your reality and in your MIND it’s really happening as you see it.

Last night, I was hysterical. When a person is hysterical it’s like watching a wind up toy shake sporadically and buzz noisily going nowhere. It dies down and when you touch it it just might have a little more buzz and movement left.

The entire time I’m hysterical, God didn’t answer any questions and didn’t provide any comfort. Hysterical people ask question and refute your rational answers. You try to hug them or hold them and they fight you or pull away. God or Spirit just let me wind down. I went to sleep 💤.

I woke up in a decent mood to a sunny Sunday morning. I’m now sipping French roasted coffee. And Spirit speaks:

Nikki, I love you. I’m sorry your circumstances, combined with unexpected situations yesterday, your physical issues and the news I gave you sent you seemingly over the edge. But you asked a question I felt like you needed to know the answer to. I knew you would feel and think the way you did so I just let you be. It wasn’t a good time for us to talk but, I was there of course.

I hope you enjoyed the dream I gave you in which you traveled to New Orleans. You were having FUN and I made sure it was filled with vibrant colors and vibrant energy. Did you see the beautiful fabrics you were going to buy? I wanted to show you reality and get you to feel it.

Last night, you were out of control and I’m not upset about it at all because no harm was done. I’m glad you went through that illusion. Like the hall of mirrors in a so called funhouse. Things can get strange in there. Moving stairs to throw you off balance and make you stumble. Creepy clowns and mazes. I had to wait until you came out.

Now that it’s morning I want to tell you there is a time to go with the flow and there is a time to go against the current. When you discover you’re drastically off your life course it can be an overwhelming feeling as you look at how far you have to go to get back there and how much time you think you’ve wasted. Your arms (your mind) gets tired. You get exhausted. Rational: This is too much. I’m tired. Frustrated. I need to rest. Hysteria: This is too much. I’m never going to be able to do it. I’m tired. I may as well let go. Don’t try to save me but save me. I should save myself. Look at all the people ahead of me. I was too weak to be like them. Why did this happen to me. Why did I do this to myself. I’m dying. I’m dead. Go on without me. Leave me be. I’m dead.

There you were spinning. You spun out. Now we can keep going until you get back to start because this is what you’ve chosen because you need an understanding of what happened so you can heal. You can also choose to let all that go and start where you are. Either way the time will be the same because in the universe flow as you said yesterday, there is no time! There’s no shame in needing an understanding of the trauma and how it affected you. Infected you. I needed to tell you that you were set on this course by that person at an age you didn’t know how to manage it, handle it, it’s like, picking up a wobbling toddler headed to home which she can see familiar faces and turning her around to the forest. She survives by wondering, barely escaping danger, growing up, forgetting the memories of home until reminded in her dreams and feelings in heart: I’m not suppose to be here. But here is familiar. I’ve learned alot here. But I don’t like here. And now you are grown and you are going home. Home… Where you were going in the first place. You just had a moment of hysteria while crossing the river. It took you a little further than you wanted to go. Dry off. Have coffee. You still got your lessons. Go on. Flow ahead. More lessons on the way. Count this one as a lesson. Lessons can be used anyway you choose.

~Nikki

See my blog Zen Flow Universe to see the truth that was revealed that pushed me over the edge to hysteria.

 

 

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Yielding to the Fruit of the Spirit

There’s a green light to being mean, nasty, doing evil and speaking ill in this world. We don’t have to ponder whether to snap back or plot revenge. We enjoy it in this world. It makes us feel good about ourselves and causes and powerful. It’s like drinking poison and saying ahhhh now that was refreshing! We disregard the harm of others and only think about what we did when the consequences, karma or the law catches up with us.
I’d like to throw flowers in the air tell you what the world needs now is love sweet love and that may be true but first the world needs a swift kick in the behind and a lesson on humanity. THEN we may place crowns of flowers on our heads and sway side to side or hold up a candles for a visual.
Instead taking the highway of hate one can learn by practicing… Key word practicing Yielding to the Fruit of the Spirit. Isn’t that a “Christian” principle? Um, I never knew Spirit to be associated with only the Christian religion. I’d think it applies to anyone who has a spirit. Anyways dot dot dot (…)
Yielding to love, kindness, peace, patience, forbearance, joy, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self control can only help us all become better human beings. Yielding requires a slowing down to access on coming traffic to make a decision whether it’s clear for you to proceed or of you need to STOP and wait for an open space to keep going. Or you could just plow right into traffic, hurt others and yourself and receive a ticket. Yeah… That’s what we do when we don’t yield to the fruit of the spirit. We hurt others and ourselves and receive a big fat ticket from the UNIVERSE signed by Officer Karma. Slow down and have a good day… Hands you the ticket.
-Nikki

 

#AtoZChallengeTasty Fruit Salad Wallpapers Pictures Photos Images

The UNRAVELING of yoU.

Bryan Hehir’s “Seamless Garment” Unravels _ Bryan Hehir Exposed

Uh oh 😞. This can’t be good. You know the outcome of this type of situation because you’ve done it and seen it before. You pull the string and there it goes. You put it in the washer or dryer and when you open the door it it’s no more but shreds of what it use to be. Or what about that fine garment that you can just pull the thread and watch it go from a scarf or skirt to this amazingly long piece of very fine threading. Poof!!! Vanished!!!

Holding it together when everything is falling apart _ an extended ___

Whenever I think of something unraveling I think of nothing salvageable being left. You may as well toss it and get a new one or say your farewell. Maybe both.

I give the years 2010 until 2015 for me the ominous title THE UNRAVELING. I imagine it in big red scary creepy Steven Spielberg letters. You’re afraid to open the book!!! It’s the years I’ve been dealt the most blows, seen the most valleys, cried the most tears, lost quite a bit, and mostly spent in darkness catching glimpses of light. Anguish and hell. It’s the unraveling of everything you once knew and once were. The familiar is gone. It’s a how did I get here, let me count the ways moment. It’s a “Wait. No. I wasn’t ready.” The sudden death of your life as you know it. Yes. The unraveling is fast but seems to go on forever and you can’t stop it. And you know when it gets to the end there will be nothing left that you can make sense out of. You’ll have the memory of what it use to be and the scars to prove it existed.

As I look at the heap of life I once knew, I know it’s gone. So now what do I do? I say to God. Now what? In the natural we replace it if it’s a necessity or we really like it. And it may not be the exact same one but, we learn to love it or like it. Sometimes we say”I’ll purchase a better one this time and make sure I take care of it.” Heck it may even come with an extra pocket or hood or fancier stitch.

So the Universe speaks. Hold it right there. I’ll get you a NEW ONE. I’m sorry your old life got ripped to shreds in the unraveling but it was time. (you frown) Listen says the Universe, I’ve got to make this NEW LIFE for you but I need your input and cooperation. Work with me. Let’s make it the best NEW LIFE ever! Dream it up! Find your new pleasures, scrap the good from the old going forth with lessons learned as the new pattern. We’ll weave it all in. Oh oh I know. You’ll have your moments threading a NEW LIFE but cry your way through. Shout your way through it. Just keep sewing sewing sewing (Universe sings in Dori voice from Finding Nemo) and before you know it you’ll start to smile more. You’ll step back and see things are coming along. It’s going to be fabulous. It’s going to be rich with love and opportunities to improve. To live up to your highest potential.

So as scary as the unraveling is… You will be given NEW LIFE and this time you’ll remember working with the Creator to create it. Hmmm… It’s all coming back to me. Now lets get back to making this pattern…let’s see. Where did I put that lesson on self love…oh here it is! Right in front of me!!!

~Nikki

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Women. You don’t have time for BOYS.

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I remember my parents telling me when I was in school “Your education comes first. You don’t have time for boys.” I can’t say I always listened to this instruction but, I can say it always came back to me. I tell my daughter to focus on her education while she is in school and eventually, college and not on boys. This is the time to figure out what makes you happy and what you enjoy. In other words, don’t make boys your priority. Impress yourself.

Well, as a woman, I want to tell you, I still don’t have time for boys. However, I do have time for men. I don’t have time for boys for different reasons other than education and trying to figure out what makes me happy and what I enjoy ( I was a late bloomer in that area and I am still figuring some things out). When you are mature in your emotions, when you are working towards achieving a more fulfilling life, be it socially, emotionally, physically, etc you don’t have time for boys. Boys will jerk your emotions around. Boys will destabilize your foundation. Boys will waste your time. Boys will play games. Boys don’t know what they want. They are still trying to figure out their role as a man. Sure they work. Sure some have financial goals but when it comes to relationships I find boys are still in it for selfish gain. I find men are in it for the satisfaction of themselves and their partner. I think you can be a man in many areas but a boy in other areas. I think the same about women. We can be a woman about our financial affairs but, a girl when it comes to what we allow in a relationship. What I mean by both of those statements is it comes down to growth and maturity. When you were a child, you acted like a child but when you became an adult, you should have or at least be aggressively working on putting away childish motives, attitudes, actions, fears and phobias.

Let me clarify this: I have time for men, who may be boys in an area but, are doing their best to grow in the area of love and relationships. However, I can’t allow the repeated abuse of my heart.

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Balance, After Grounding

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You cannot have balance if you do not ground yourself first-Nicole Jackson via Holy Spirit. I asked this question this morning during “coffee” meditation and this is the answer given to me. In my study this year to become my Authentic Self, I am on the subject “Balance and Grounding.”

“Ground YOURSELF in YOUR beliefs as it relates to your religion and beyond (yourself, world views). Know what it is YOU believe and understand it. Know what it is YOU don’t believe and why it is you don’t believe it. Whatever you believe and do must be grounded in love or you will not have balance. ”

“I am not upset with you, I will not disown you, I will not pay you back, for not believing everything you read or hear. What kind of God would I be? I created you a reasoning being but, I also created you spiritual. In due time, you will understand or have no need to understand. You have all of eternity to understand (study and research) or experience (trials, errors, success-no such thing as failure) what you don’t “get” or “feel”. I am patient. Nothing can separate you from my love. You don’t have to feel guilty about not understanding or not believing or not agreeing.”

“Know this: There are spiritual laws in effect and earthly laws in effect. I have covered all the bases for your success…even if it doesn’t look like success.”

Grounding. I got it. I can get it. I have to take some time to figure out what I believe and what beliefs I have outgrown. Including the ones about myself. I can’t keep putting on beliefs I have outgrown via understanding and experience-growth. I probably look like a graduate trying to sit at the Kindergarten table in order to please the Teachers.

 

 

Nikki’s #WonderWomanWednesday Affirmation

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I AM Power.
I dance to the music in my heart.
I change my mind therefore I have the power to correct my thinking to adjust my emotions and to change the direction of my course.
I refrain from judging other women’s path and decisions. I find ways to assist them instead.
I appreciate other’s differences and beauty.
I don’t need anyone’s approval to do what I came here to do.
My relationship with the Divine is mines and it is unique.
I express myself in my own way. It is my right.
I rise and I fly.
My beauty begins on the inside and radiates on the outside.