Rise Up Again

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You have the courage and the strength to rise up again. Again means you have done it before and  if you have done it before you can do it again. I know. it’s never been this devastating. I know, it’s never been this dark. I know it’s never been this hard. Still, you have it in you to rise once more and again if you have to. And when you rise, pray.

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And when you rise up, TAKE courage. Sometimes you have to TAKE courage and do what needs to be done.

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Rise up.

~Nikki

 

 

Family Ties or Tourniquet?

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When it comes to the dysfunction of family, your’re either the problem, part of the problem or have distant yourself from the problematic people. The latter has chosen a means of survival to preserve their peace of mind and sanity. The fighting (physically in some families), the bickering, the drinking and apologizing later, the spilling of family secrets, the manipulation, the games, the ones who switch sides faster than a blink of an eye, who’s mad at who this year, the constant windmill of gossip is more than a few can take but, seems to be very enjoyable by others in the family. I mean some just can’t get enough of the drama and they say to their detriment “Well, you can’t get rid of family. Blood is thicker than water.” Blood is not always thicker than water and while you can’t get rid of your family you don’t have to be a part of the circus. WARNING: I’d think twice and twice again before marrying into a family full of chaos and drama. I have found the way people interact with their family is how they interact in their relationships. My nerves are too bad for your family’s constant turmoil.

Some family ties are more like a tourniquet cutting the life and light off within you. You can barely make it through a cook out or another pot un-luck dinner. You get sick to your stomach thinking about “going over there.” Torture.

It takes  a strong individual to command peace in an environment of chaos and a brave one to go in time after time into the “Family Feud”. Instead of a host for the show you need a referee! If your spiritual life and your family life are polar opposites then it could be because of the ties are becoming a tourniquet. No way your busy body becomes a holy body at mass, a mosque, or whatever your holy day of the week is, and goes back to a busy body in the family keeping up mess. No way you can teach forgiveness and you can’t forgive your sister. No way you can read daily devotions and scriptures and curse everyone out in a drunken tirade every family gathering. What’s going on here?

You may not can be light to everyone in your family but, you’ll surely die if you don’t cut those ties that are tourniquets.

~Nikki

Just a free flow of thoughts today on this. No particular organization of thoughts. I hope you get something out of it.

 

Mars in Retrograde. My Bad.

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Sunday morning coffee musing:
Yesterday was a pretty good day. I spent the evening with my daughter and friends at a free concert at The Levitt Shell. It’s a free concert series in Memphis,TN that starts in the summer and lasts until October. Everything was great until…

My temper suddenly had a flashback to a time where I had no restraint. Out the blue (though they tell me there’s no such thing as out the blue…meh), I had two things that seemed to set me off:
1. A lady in traffic.
2. Neighbors parking in my PAID parking space without asking!!!!

Oh when I tell you I lost it…I lost it. When I finally settled into bed I had to ask myself what is wrong with you? Is it the moon? Planets out of whack? Are you really upset about something else? What are you so angry about? What’s with this irrational behavior?

A friend suggested I needed to ground myself. I did. But, the logic in me needed an answer to the why. I don’t know much about astrology (just about zodiac signs) as it relates to charts, but I found it interesting Mars is in retrograde (had to find out what that meant then it became ah ha! Interesting!). Basically, it could be the cause of my irrational behavior and outburst. However, being a Christian I could just blame the devil. Logically, I’m taking responsibility for my actions/responses but, I needed to know why. Psychology tells me perhaps subconsciously I was tired and already bubbling with irritability. All I needed was something, anything to tick me off. Oh, and don’t forget, I created these circumstances with that undercurrent of low level energy.

Breathe. I don’t need to know why. I need to release the need to know why (this time) and move on into the new day I have been given. There is no pressure from the Creator to be perfect all the time. Only the strong suggestion to be mature. To grow…continuously. My response in both situations wasn’t mature, but taking responsibility for my irrational behavior and response was. Win-win.

~Nikki

Meditation. Uprooted and Replanted.

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I pray and I meditate. In my meditation I received this and wanted to share with those who may be experiencing some alarming shifting in your life. I do write down what I receive most times. It can be instructions or dialogue or colors…I do have visions during meditation also. So….here we go.

Private devotion/meditation made public:

God/Spirit: God makes you grow. If you outgrow you have to be uprooted and planted elsewhere. We are not necessarily talking about a physical move as much as a spiritual transplant. One of your favorite scriptures you received the first time you read it is: Psalm 1:3

(Note to you: I use to read this scripture as a child and say I want to be a tree planted by the waters before I knew what that meant. I found it peaceful.)

3 And he shall be like a tree planted by the rivers of water, that bringeth forth his fruit in his season; his leaf also shall not wither; and whatsoever he doeth shall prosper. Nicole, you feel unstable because you are being transferred. You are ready to be planted by the rivers of water. Uprooting is unsettling but, know you are in my hands. Seed has been planted, water has been given, I gave the increase and now you have to move. It’s what you always wanted. Fear not. You’re welcome.

Me: Wait. I wasn’t there already? I wasn’t already planted by the rivers of water?

God/Spirit: You were there and are there. This is awareness of the process. You see the end but you live the process in this realm…and as you grow you will see more of the “before you can ask, think of it, I will answer.”

Namaste. Shalom. Amen.

~Nikki

Rising Fear, Rising Faith

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I live in a city where senseless and violent crimes take place daily. I live in a city where educational programs are often squandered and where politics lean towards the influence of the wealthy. This produces fear, anger, and flight. This produces arguments and lethargy.

Now factor in raising children, health problems, unemployment, starving artists, underpaid teachers and overpaid leaders, aging parents, debts, low paying jobs, past catching up, uncertainty about the future, marriage, divorce, single life and dating, finances, careers, family matters… You’ve got a whirlwind of fear dancing about your mind, body, and spirit. Torture. Did I say whirlwind? I meant a category 5 tornado.

Where do you stand? (Stand Nikki? I’m laying down and taking a nap. I’m drinking. I’m chain smoking. I’m overeating. I’m not eating. I’m confrontational. I’m not doing anything. I’m not sleeping.) Let me rephrase, “How do you stand?” I heard an intelligent being say, by the name of Nicole Jackson, “Rising fear is met with a rising active faith.” I love to be the bearer of good news. So, in other words “You have to meet fear with action! A faith that DOES SOMETHING. FAITH IS AN ACTION WORD.”

All of the knowledge/wisdom you’ve absorbed from the Creator, Shamans, Priests, Gurus, Ancestors, Life, etc. It’s time to use it. Prayer and meditation is a two way conversation between you and the universe (known to many buy God, Creator, Divine, etc.) Let prayer and meditation pour into you instructions you need “for such a time as this.” Perhaps this is new to you. You maybe a young adult. Listen, wisdom is all around you. It’s in your parents, grandparents, mentor, your beliefs, a book, mistakes, this blog. It’ll come to you Young Jedi.

Have no fear. Instead, activate your rising faith.

~Nikki

 

Bubble Wrap

 

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Have you ever received a package 📦 that arrived beat up, dented, ripped or wet? You were thinking “Oh no! I hope it’s okay.” You see it’s labeled fragile, handle with care which clearly didn’t happen. But when you open it, everything is just fine. It’s whole despite the rough trip. Yep. Thank God He bubble wrapped you!!

Confidence Seed. Take Root.

 

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Where there is smoke, there is fire.
Where there is fear, there is a lack of confidence. You’ve got the gift or gifts but, what’s holding you back? Is it the thought that you can’t do it? Maybe you sorta kinda feel that you can but, you just don’t know.

Confidence is more than saying I can do it. Confidence is a strong conviction that you CAN do it. It has to take ROOT in your core being. But how? For those of us that lack self confidence. I’m writing this via the spirit, on the fly, given to me as I type. So, here we go in no order or logic to my knowledge:

Some of us never had confidence so to speak (I believe you are born with it but, many times it needs to be nurtured as a child. Hence, confidence building. Then there are others that just have it). If you were a child brought up in an environment that tore your confidence down daily, you may not have been fortunate enough to have had the mental fortitude to survive that. On the other hand, some of you in that environment held on to that voice on the inside telling you  “you can do it” but, you’re still lacking the confidence. Illnesses, accidents, tragedies, huge setbacks, have a way of merely destroying our confidence. If you allow it and let’s be honest, some of us have allowed it. No guilt.

Confidence comes from knowing that you’re already equip with some knowledge of how to manifest your gift and knowing that whatever you don’t know will come to you via research, another person that has already paved the way, or stumbling upon a method through trial and error. Call it divine intervention or instructions. “Something” told me to…I just so happen to be at…
Confidence is strengthened by trial and error. You gain the “how to” through the “don’t do.”-Nicole Jackson. Don’t be afraid to make mistakes. Mistakes are teachers. Thank the teacher. Accept the answer and move forward.
Confidence is planted by action. You’ve got confidence. You’ve been SAYING IT, THINKING IT but have you been DOING IT? IMAGINE a seed 🌱 in your hand. And you look at it and say “I can plant it. I will plant it. I am planting it.” You lay down and you “think about planting it. See yourself planting it” but you’re still holding the seed in your hand! When you ACTUALLY take  ACTION is when the seed will get planted. The more you do your gift, the more confidence grows and deepens its ROOT in your soul. In your psyche. Doing your gift is the watering, sunlight, weeding.
You want your confidence to take root? Don’t mind the weather. Don’t mind the naysayers and the negative thoughts that come to you discourage you. If you do, you’ll be digging up the confidence seed. Bonus: Confidence also can be planted in any season.
This is all the Holy Spirit gave me and I have shared it with you!

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~Nikki

The Cool Kids

 

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In Elementary, Junior High/Middle School, and High School there were times you were included in circles and excluded. You would think there would be no surprise when you find yourself outside of a group of friends or associates. But, sometimes you are indeed a bit surprised.

Before you begin to make assumptions take a look at the circumstances surrounding the situation. Maybe it was talked about and planned when you were not there. Maybe they honestly forgot to mention it to you. Maybe they thought someone else in the group let you know. Maybe you were too busy. Maybe you forgot.

However, there are times when you will be purposely excluded. You are not in High School and this is adulthood. They don’t always want to hang with you and you must be mature enough to handle this by knowing it’s perfectly okay. It’s not to be taken personal. However, sometimes exclusion IS a signal to you about where you stand with this group or associates. Take note.

You know my daughter had this situation among two friends of hers. One of her friends would get jealous if her best friend spent time with another friend. I laughed a little because I remember those days. I told her well, this is something that doesn’t change much among many women as they get older. It is because they are afraid of losing that special bond with a friend. It’s a bit selfish but, I can understand those feelings. She has to learn that it is okay to share friendships and most of the time it takes nothing away from the friendship you have with that person. As a matter of fact, you can actually lose some friends by being too possessive. If she is this way with a friend she will be this way with a boyfriend and it’s not healthy (of course boyfriends shouldn’t be shared!). I explained all of this to my daughter.

I started my early years as mostly a loner with other loners. Then I associated with a main group of friends in middle school but, had other associations. Once I reached high school I kept a core group but expanded into other associations. I have learned to be PRESENT when I am included and NOT PRESENT when I am excluded (lol). I don’t take it personal. At least, not anymore.

 

 

Champion Your Thoughts

 

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Muhammad Ali was a champion in many ways but, what made him a champion in those ways was his ability to champion his thoughts.

As I reflect on my life I look at the ways I use self defeating thoughts verses champion thoughts. Many of us have been preprogrammed with thoughts or conditioned to think certain thoughts through experiences. Either good or negative, we think. If I’m to be honest, my thought process didn’t begin to change until I was 30 (however, I woke up so to speak at 26)  and here we have it 11 years later, finally taking root and blooming.

Champion thoughts requires hard, grueling, relentless and challenging work. Long hours at the spiritual gym within and a spiritual diet fit for a champion. You can’t eat (listen to, digest) anything that’s put on your plate. You will suffer some defeats, barely make rounds, but you will begin to win more than you lose when you learn to never change your champion mentality. But, you need only to adjust your approach, strategy, study your opposition and hit the spiritual gym more. Reflect.

A champion doesn’t become a champion by building the body only. Many men have lost relying on brute force alone. Many have lost the fight in this life with brute force alone. Champion thoughts help you get through the toughest times in your life. I look at Muhammad Ali and even though his body was attacked by Parkinson’s and  it silenced him physically, HE WAS STILL SEEN AS THE CHAMP. Champion thoughts  have no need be verbalized all the time. Champion thoughts don’t care about your pain, wins, losses or draw.  Champion have a need to be lived. May we live out our lives from here on out with champion thoughts. May we not see the world as we have in our twenties but, as the champions we are. Are you not still standing? Raise your arms up high, fist to the sky, Champion.

~Nikki

Bad Energy Family Members. Bingo! You’re It!

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Let’s cut to the chase. Maybe you don’t know YOU are the bad energy toting family member. Here are clues and what your energy does to others who don’t know how, don’t have the heart or guts to confront you.

Certain family members no longer show up or limit their time in your space because they can’t deal with your behavior
You’ve been asked several times to tone it down but you don’t because you don’t see anything wrong
You can’t wait to get a rise out of a particular family member. Even though they’ve told you to stop
You feel good when you make other people upset or you think nothing about it
You refuse to apologize for embarrassing family members
Family members cringe at your off colored, off putting remarks and you go “What?”
You get offended and defensive when confronted about your behavior
Deep down inside you know you have a problem and your behavior is a problem but you don’t have the courage to admit it and tackle the real issues behind your mean spirit
You say “So what. Others are too sensitive. Lighten up!”

Your behavior:
Affects the mood of every family event
Makes others feel demeaned in an environment they should feel uplifted
Makes others feel constricted because they have to avoid you at all cost
Makes others feel attacked when they should feel love
Makes others ill when you arrive
Makes others feel rushed because they know they can’t stay long and enjoy other family because they can’t take your bad energy

Figure out what the real problem is in your private life. Take a good look in the mirror at what you do and what you say and ask yourself why can’t you stop doing the things that cause harm and rifts in the family? Rather it’s a coming to Jesus, Self or Therapist moment, I hope you build up the nerve to come. As you are.

~Nikki

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