A to Z: Keep it Moving. Empowerment, My Personal Journey

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The ability to move on after a set back, after a break up or a break down, calls for courage and the building up of self esteem. Also, the ability to move on, ignore, deal with the small fires that poop up, the rude comments, the opinions and attempted sabotage on our reputations or goals is empowering. Why? Because you don’t exert energy into the small things, the minors in life. Why major in the minor annoyances of life when you can put your energy into dreams and goals or the other things that need to be done that day? Reserve your energy for what really matters.

Keep it Moving. You have things to do, places to go, and people to see.

~Nikki

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A to Z: Embrace; Empowerment, My Personal Journey

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I embrace all of my good qualities. I look at qualities or practices that no longer serve me and began the work of evolving from those into something which serves my higher self. Also, I examine myself often. I challenge what others say about me and then I examine myself to see if that is true. If it is, I work on it. If it is not, I discard it. Perhaps, I try to represent my feelings and thoughts in such a way it is clear. However, I don’t get caught up in trying to explain and clarify too much because I realize some people are going to misconstrue what I say anyway. This is when I began to avoid or put distance or lessen interactions with this individual who clearly has a personal problem with me.

~Nikki

Sunday Morning Coffee Musing: Accepting an Ever Changing You

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All of us have changed physically as we are all aging. Some of us however, have changed physically and it’s not because of aging, but because of some situation, circumstance, accident, incident, illness, or disease. These are the UNEXPECTED changes that affects us physically and mentally. We all seem to have the initial shock of it all, but not many of us embrace it with the same attitudes. Some of us unwillingly accept it in our own time and in our own way. And still, some will never accept it and wither down into a path of despair. If you see them, try to encourage them along the way.

Who’s going to want me after they find out, or see, this or that? It’s a valid question. We live in a judgmental, stereotypical beauty, pretend perfect world. We ourselves have been judgmental perhaps. It’s a terrifying question even if you are married. Will they still want you and how will this change the marriage? Not all remain. Even friends dwindle and relationships fade. Insecurities rise and self esteem tumbles. Imagine not having much of that to begin with and we are looking at developing or increasing anxieties and depression.

Here is the question I ask you, “Do you accept you as you are now?” Maybe you are at the EMPHATICALLY yes stage and maybe you are a definite NO, or somewhere in between. If it’s no or in between then begin the work, yes work of ACCEPTING you as you are. The slow EMBRACE of change, and the ever changing you. Even with my unexpected changes in life, guess what? There will be more. There will be the regular changes of aging and sometimes that happens during the acceptance of the unexpected. A doozey, I know! But acceptance of yourself increases your confidence and helps you brave the fear of the unknown and face the reality. You may not be accepted by someone because of an illness or what you look like now. It may be “too much” for them. Or, you just may be accepted by those that understand and those that can see you for who you truly are or have become.

My journey of acceptance of who I am now was overwhelming. Much like others. However, I am here to tell you that my feet are on solid ground most days. And on the days they are not, I get back up.

~Nikki

Sunday Morning Coffee Musings: Letting go of Limiting Beliefs

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Hello again blog readers! I began my day with two guided meditations from the app Insight Timer. I woke up at 4:03 and again at 5:03. I was up for a while and debating on if I should try to go back to sleep. I think the first meditation session set the tone for my second one. It was about setting your intentions for the day. She had us to repeat: “My life is good today” and she even addressed if we had resistance to this very thought.

My second session was really powerful about limited beliefs. It addressed all kinds, but what came to mind for me was a personal religious belief. I can’t say if I was formally taught this belief, but I think it was implied. This belief has held me back at times. I can’t quite decide if it’s wrong or not even a matter. In life, and in religion, sometimes we put a weight on things we shouldn’t. Sometimes, well many times, I find my religion majors in minors. But, society does this, too. We focus on the speck in others eye, instead of the log in ours. I really wanted to be free of this limiting belief. So, I sought out something from the Universe…also known as the Deep.

I will continue to eradicate this limiting belief about myself. It blocks my root, heart, and crown chakra. I know it’s crazy to hear a Christian talking about chakras. But, we are energy. Deep calls unto the deep and if you can’t understand then the deep is not calling you right now. You feel things (energy or emotions) in different parts of your body. Some say I had a “gut” feeling or I felt it in my “heart.” Some may feel it in there “head” or “forehead” and to me these things are just like chakras.

Well, after the meditation I gained a better perspective of my limiting belief and I am able to carry out my mission for the day without this negative belief about myself handed to me by religion.

~Nikki

Five Things About 42 Before 43

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  1. It was legendary because I stretched out my faith, moved beyond my fears, and took leaps
  2. Some wounds by those closest to you can change the dynamics of the relationship forever even after you have forgiven them
  3. Not my circus. Not my monkey. Liberation.
  4. I don’t need anyone to sign off on my relationship with God. No one gets to decide if I am a REAL CHRISTIAN. Liberation
  5. I don’t need to be believed or understood. I don’t need to explain. I am who I am. I be who I be. Liberation.

~Nikki

My 42 Journey was about Liberation and Legendary Actions

RA Blog: All Eyes on Me (Thee)

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It seems as if everyone else is whizzing right past you as you “mosey” along or perhaps you are not moving at all. Maybe, you are stuck. Well, I have goals because I set goals. I have dreams and new dreams, new visions, things I want to see happen in the face of Rheumatoid Arthritis, Fibromyalgia and all of that other noise that seems to slow me down and sometimes get the best of me.

In the effort to lose weight, to achieve my other goals as well, it seems as if the well abled bodied people are just flying right past me. Soaring to their goals, and I, I am left behind in their dust. Me? I’m struggling to stay motivated. I can’t walk that fast, like I use to. I can’t use my hands very well today, I can’t stand as long as I use to, the fatigue…it’s what some call excuses, but it’s a reality for many of us. We are not who we use to be and oh if we would have known this was coming, we may have did the 5K or went back to school sooner.

Q: Dear God, Universe, Creator, Self, Spirit, how do I deal with all the feels of being left behind?

A: Take your eyes off others and put your eyes on me. Keep your eyes on “your” prize. Stop the comparison. It’s unfair and foolish to compare yourself with well abled bodied people and it’s unfair to compare yourself to the old self. You can’t be in the past and present at the same time. This is why you are not progressing as fast or at all.

So, with that revelation, I invite you to meditation and prayer. Center yourself during the times when you are “feeling” so much despair and disappointment. If I keep watching others I will fall. If I keep comparing myself to others, I will fail. If I keep living in the past, I can’t work in the present to prepare for my future. All eyes on the Creator. All eyes on the scriptures, affirmations, practices, that center your heart and mind.

~Nikki

Oh. If You Could Only Understand Me.

Seek ye FIRST to understand AND THEN, to be understood. -Steven Covey

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I had an awesome morning and just as awesome as my morning to mid day was, my evening fell apart emotionally and mentally. I missed all the big signs from the Universe, God, that led to a big blow up and verbal altercation. Immediately after words of war were exchanged, I knew I was not angry about what was happening at that moment I was angry about several things that had NOTHING to do with the current situation. I also knew intuitively, the other person was having a bad day. Needless to say, when I made it home I was fighting all sorts of emotions, curse words, and even threw my purse! (Whoa!). I don’t like to get upset because it takes me a long time to calm down. I am more upset at myself in situations like this because I pride myself of self control and then I realized…just now, as I type, that self control is a PRACTICE. Practice makes mature and you have less of these experiences, BUT you are not exempt from emotional outbursts. At least, I am not. I may never completely be able to never have a “moment”, as you see I am not striving for perfection or denial of any emotions. I am only striving to be the best me, not the perfect me. However, what happened today cannot happen again…EVER.

Here is an article that I wanted to share for those who are empaths or those who are interested in knowing what one is. I could relate to all but number 6. I just want to add this is probably one reason why it takes me so long to rid myself of the impact of negative energy or too many energies. I have to forgive myself for to day and let the energies of the day seep out like a deflating balloon.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/emotional-freedom/201602/10-traits-empathic-people

~Nikki