Weary, Wounded, and Sad

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As I began to wind down from the day, I sat on the side of the bed and thought, “I am tired. I am tired of fighting. Just because I am a warrior, doesn’t mean I don’t get tired of fighting.”

God: You don’t have to fight. The battle is not yours, it’s mine.

But, I have to fight the battle in my mind.

God: You do. We do. But, if you are tired, if you are weary, you rest. “We” don’t get tired. You are not an army of one woman. You have me, you have Jesus, you have the Holy Spirit, you have YOUR angel, you have angels, you have hosts. You are surrounded by love, ancestors. A weary soldier, doesn’t make a good soldier. Didn’t you preach that one time?

Okay, I’m going to watch Greenleaf and eat some shortbread cookies with milk. Then, I am going to bed.

~Nikki

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Something About Boaz

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It’s a good thing Boaz didn’t look at how much money Ruth could bring to the table. When he saw her getting the scraps and found out her story, instead of judging her, he saw that what she could bring to the table was priceless. Loyalty exceeding death, beyond bloodlines, doing what she had to do, commitment and the ability to love and labor for those she loved. He would have missed out. #SomeThingAboutBoaz

God’s Signs, Times, and Rhema for Your Life. In Tune.

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Being in tune with God for your personal journey on this Earth is pertinent to living a COMPLETELY successful life. I am talking about prospering and being in good health (and even in that scripture there is a deeper meaning). There are seasons to your life. There are signs for you. There is a time that you should be doing something. There is a “rhema word” specifically for you and only you.

How do I know the signs, times, and hear what God is saying to me? Well, in order to be IN TUNE, one must DAILY COMUNE. Prayer? Yes. Often. Listen? Yes. Always. Look at the sky. Observe it. Stand there in the middle of nature. Feel it. See it. Find a tree that you see everyday. Look at it often. Watch it change. Nature speaks. Read. Read your religious book. Read books you are guided to at the appointed time. Sometimes I buy books but it’s not time for me to read them. It may be months or a year later. Sitting with creation is sitting with the Creator. Sitting in silence, meditative in your activities, is all communing. You only have to pay attention. Even exercising can be communing with God. After yoga, you lay there, and you give the body time to slow down. It’s the cooling off period so to speak. As the body settles down the mind does, too. Right in that moment, you can hear from Spirit.

God’s voice wasn’t in the strong wind, the earthquake, the fire, the gentle wind, after all of that, Elijah heard a voice. (1 King 19:12). Elijah heard, felt, and saw all of that and then he heard a voice. A calm voice I believe. I have no time to debate whether the voice was from without or within, in his head or heart. That is not for me to discern. I am only here today to tell you this, “In order to be in tune, you must comune.-Nicole Jackson”

~Nikki

Sunday Morning Coffee Musing: God’s Protection

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“Father, protect us as we travel to and fro on this day. Protect my family as they travel back and forth on this Thanksgiving. Protect friends and all who are on the roads. Cover us with the blood of Jesus.” That was my prayer as we got on the expressway Thanksgiving Day. When I arrived at my parents house, I dropped off the lasagna and green beans and then I got back in the car to pick up sodas from the nearest store. My daughter came out and got in the car with me.

On our way back to my parents house, a red mustang came over a hill as we were starting to cross the light which turned green for us. He was so coming so fast I slammed on my breaks and he turned which he turned as we were crossing and it was not until then he hit his breaks. Smoke was coming from his tires and it seem as if an invisible force was keeping his sports car from tailspinning. He came literally within inches of hitting my car on the passenger side where my teenage daughter was. A car was behind us as well and hit his breaks.

It seemed as everything was happening so fast and at the same time in slowmotion. When I came to a stop, my right hand had my daughter’s jacket in it as I must have been pulling her close to me and the other hand on the wheel. I had broken nails on my hand. It was nothing short of a miracle, God’s invisible hand and the assistance of angels.

We all slowly started to move and all I could do was thank God and yes, I had some “colorful words” as I ranted about the driver. I told my daughter as we were driving earlier, holidays are wonderful but, there is always some tragedy looming with some families or some innocent person as people drive in a rush, drunk, distracted, and on drugs.

We are blessed to be here. And so are the others almost involved. My daughter and my family is my world. God is the center.

~Nikki

Sunday Morning Coffee Musing: Big Spender, Small Giver

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Hey! Hey! Big Spender! Trips, vacations after vacations, casinos, shopping, expensive hair do’s, tailor and custom made, video games, gadgets and high tech devices, fast food and fancy restaurants. Tithes and Offerings…zero to five bucks. Charity? You “ain’t” got it.

Where your treasure is, there will be your heart also. Obviously.

~Nikki

Have Not…Yet.

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Some people with much more money, a bigger home, power coupled up, degreed line walls, will have an attitude towards you and you have none of those things…yet (maybe you don’t even want any of that to a degree)…Sometimes they will do all they can to STOP your progression. They can’t believe your audacity of HOPE, they can’t believe you even THINK YOU CAN rise up. These people are usually insecure and unhappy somewhere in their own lives. Pray for them. Heap those hot coals over their head (Bible) and keep on pushing. Let God prepare that table for you. It’s harvest time.

Nikki

Sunday Morning Coffee Musing: The Good Daughter

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Growing up both of my parents were pretty healthy parents. I remember an occasional flu or a minor surgery. I can’t say I know what it is like to have to “deal” with an ill parent at a young age. I don’t know for sure how much it affects the child later on in life but, I am certain it makes a world of difference what the illness is and how the parent themselves handles the illness or disease. If the parent is any parent at all, they naturally carry a bit of guilt for being sick.

My daughter is 16 and it was seven years ago when Rheumatoid Arthritis Disease came out of remission and imploded into our lives. She was 9. I pushed on five years after that working, being a mom (because well you can’t stop doing that) and my daughter has always been the most caring and concerned child through this ordeal. And I have tried my best to make sure the unpredictability of RA doesn’t take a toll on her childhood as much as it takes a toll on my body and life.

When RA first resurfaced, we didn’t know what it was. I remember waking up one morning with the Holy Telit across the foot of my bed laid there by my daughter. I remember when I had to have surgery twice, she was ready to do her part. Through my crappy attitude at times and unbearable mood swings, she has learned to either let me know or just stay out the way. I have often, come back to apologize and try to make sure it doesn’t happen too often because I don’t believe you can use your pain as an excuse to be mean to others! But, it does happen unintentionally sometimes. You have to be the type of person that is reflective of self and responsible for your behavior. That takes deep commitment to being the best you, you can be and a whole lot of Jesus, God, Holy Spirit, Creator, etc in my case.

Yesterday, she took care of her mother. It was almost like she was prepared because she knew I had a class where I would have to use my hands and sit for some time. I didn’t ask her to do anything. She just stepped right in. I have to say, I have been blessed with a good daughter. I hope I am being the good mom. I hope I have been the good mom before RA came into our lives.

~Nikki