My Top 12 Lessons of 2022 Lesson 12: My Spiritual Diet Is Important

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It’s not that I didn’t know this. It’s that I ignored this. I learned this year many people are at physical places of worship out of loyalty, tradition, and ritual. They are not getting much out of the leadership that is delivering the Word and they long to be somewhere else. They are trying to stick it out. They are confused about what to do. They know what to do but are afraid to do it. So here we sit. Here we struggle on Saturday or Sunday to get dressed. We drag ourselves to a building to hear a dry and stale message for us. It may be someone’s word but it is NOT our Word. We have to strain to get something each Sunday. We are shamefully glad when service is over.

What I eat spiritually four to five times a month matters greatly. Who I get it from matters greatly. If the Shephard that feeds you is not after God’s own heart but, a shepherd passed down or chosen by a board or worse, a shepherd that called him or herself, you won’t be fed knowledge and understanding. You will be fed something below your level of spiritual maturity. You may even be fed lukewarm food, baby food, or microwave food. You may be fed a sermon from another pastor wrote off the internet. You may be fed slop from a pastor that doesn’t study the Word. You may be fed by a leader that doesn’t walk the walk of the talk they preach on Sunday. Your flesh may be fed by slogans, catchy phrases, and slang that makes you shout but, doesn’t change your life or enlighten you. If there is no oil running from the head then there will be no oil on the people. You need oil. You need the anointing to reside in a holy place.

I found myself eating stale bread this year more often than I would have liked. It is not like fresh bread wasn’t available. I went because I was asked to do something or speak. I went out of obligation. I went because I know it looks bad for me to not be there. I went out of love and then was upset after the meal was served as if I didn’t know there would be mediocracy on the menu.

My spiritual diet is vital to my soul. It is vital to my life. If I didn’t tune into other spiritual leaders and guides, myself, I may have given up on God and I may even have given up on life. Thank goodness, and God, I had eaten enough in the past to pull from. Thank goodness, thank God, I had something to hold onto and that I do have a strong relationship with my Creator.

~Nikki

My Top 12 Lessons of 2022 Lesson 11: Some People Like You But, They Don’t Like You

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I asked my daughter, “Have you ever had someone like you but they don’t like you?” And before I could explain she exclaimed, “Oh my God! Yessss mama!”

I was shocked she understood and I continued to go in depth into the matter. “It’s like they would like you if you they didn’t have a reputation to uphold.” They would like you if they hadn’t been talking about you behind your back so badly or in the same room as they text their friends about you. There are moments when they let their guard down when others aren’t around but as soon as their clique appears or squad the part of them that would be in harmony with you disappears. Deep down inside they suspect you would be a good friend or an asset but their pride won’t let them connect with you. Instead, they find ways to drive more wedges between you and them. I mean after all; they would have to admit they are wrong about you and face the firing squad of their group. They remain two-faced. Two-faced people can never, ever be trusted. “A double minded man is unstable in all his ways.” James 1:8 You wouldn’t trust a two-legged chair.

It takes a courageous and mature person to say, “I was wrong about you.” I’ve had people say that to me and I have said it to others. It is usually after you get to know a person or see something in them that indicates you have misjudged or misunderstood them.

Lesson: With great deliberation and intention, make meaningful connections with people that want to do the same with you. Remove yourself from places and spaces you’re not welcomed.

“And whosoever shall not receive you, nor hear your words, when ye depart out of that house or city, shake off the dust of your feet.” Matthew 10:14

~Nikki

My Top 12 Lessons of 2022 Lesson 10: You Can’t Escape the Season You Are In

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Life has ebb and flow, ups and downs. Life also has seasons. Someone had an amazing year. They were on top of the world. Someone had a good year with some hard moments or situations. Someone had a very rough year and had to search long and hard for silver linings. I was the latter.

I spent the first part of the year trying to resist the season I was in. I knew it would be a season or year of endings but, I didn’t think it would be as difficult and as challenging as it was. I kept in mind “With endings come new beginnings” and was expecting those new beginnings to show up right away. They did not and when they didn’t, I fought against it. I gave up several times but got back up after sleeping (resting see https://nikkisconfettilife.com/2022/12/22/my-top-lessons-of-2022-lesson-9-sleep-is-powerful/ ) and spiritual guidance.

It was the middle of the year when God spoke and told me I was going through an evolution. I would not be the same. It was then that I realized this was not the first time in my life I had gone through an evolution. In fact, I have and we have been going through periods of evolution in our lives since birth and awareness. And we will continue because life has seasons and/or cycles that repeat themselves. Once you recognize what is going on you can handle things better. You can cope with things better as you grow in grace and wisdom. I thought I wasn’t going to make it sometimes because life seemed so dark this year. But what I now understand is that birth can sometimes look like death because of the pain, suffering, and darkness surrounding the removal of old ways, patterns, things, and people.

In the Bible, when the man whose hand was withered was told by Jesus to “stretch forth his hand” I bet it felt like his entire arm was going to break and fall off. Imagine something being as tight, unused muscle, bone, and tissue being a particular way for years and years and it unfolding. I felt like I was being dashed against mountains. I felt like I was being abandoned. There was great confusion. There was despair and disdain. There was anger. God took it all. God can take whatever you throw because God understands you will be okay, better, afterwhile. God doesn’t take it personal. I was being UNFOLDED from the WOMB of old habits, attachments, patterns, people and things that no longer served by higher good. I was coming into a larger space like a baby folded up in a womb for 9 months being birth. The baby has no idea what is happening. The baby cries after birth and needs to do so to clear the airways in order to breathe. People will rejoice at the baby but, they don’t want to hear about your labor pain. I want you to know it’s a sacred time with you and the Creator. Most of the people interested in your labor pain are those that are in labor or have been in labor.

My limbs (my mind and heart in this case) needed to unfold into this new space, this new era of my life. Being born is a season you can’t control. It can only be accepted. Sometimes it will be during the process and sometimes it will be after the process spiritually speaking. You may not even fully accept it until much after or when you come into awareness that it was birthing season. A season of coming through a very long dark canal wondering if there is a light at the end. Sometimes fearing the light at the end. Sometimes not realizing that you are light in the tunnel coming into a new space. In life we must continue to EXPAND.

My mantra for next year (given to me in prayer and meditation) is to BE YOUR LIGHT AND SHINE UNAPOLOGICALLY. You read it correctly. Be your light. I am not to be a light or the light but to be my light. We all have a light within that shines. Your light within is not like my light. My light is not like yours. I don’t get to create your light and tell you how to shine. This light is created in you by a Higher Power. I could not escape the season I was in. It was happening whether I was aware of it or not. Now that I look back on some years in my life where “all hell was breaking loose” it is because it was. I was being born again.

“You are the world’s light—it is impossible to hide a town built on the top of a hill.” Matthew 5:14

Your light is needed in this world!

~Nikki

My Top Lessons of 2022 Lesson # 9: Sleep is POWERFUL

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As a person with underlying conditions, sleep can be allusive. In addition to insomnia, there is pain-somnia (the inability to sleep well due to pain through the night) and then there is the thing I do from time to time. I am wired and cannot sleep until late into the night or early morning. This year I have ensured I go to bed on time for the most part. I have created a flexible routine.

Today there is a culture of “Grind until I die, Team No Sleep, or I’ll Sleep When I Die”. Sleep is seen as a sign of a lack of drive and weakness. Boy, if they only knew the power of sleep. I dream most of the time when I am sleeping. I get messages for myself mostly when I dream. If I don’t sleep. I don’t dream. I like to dream. Sleep gives your body time to repair cells and rejuvenate itself. We were designed to sleep. Sleep can help settle, declutter, and clear the mind. It can give you new and fresh ideas. It can give you strength and the power to keep going. You can run circles around people that intentionally do not rest. Some sleep but not many rest. Rest involves your whole being and not just your body. Keep this in mind when it comes to sleep. I added the parenthesis of mind and spirit on the list below.

Getting enough sleep has many benefits. It can help you:

  • Get sick less often
  • Stay at a healthy weight
  • Lower your risk for serious health problems, like diabetes and heart disease 
  • Reduce stress and improve your mood
  • Think more clearly and do better in school and at work (mind)
  • Get along better with people (mind and spirit)
  • Make good decisions and avoid injuries (mind)

https://health.gov/myhealthfinder/healthy-living/mental-health-and-relationships/get-enough-sleep

Sleep has blessed my life tremendously this year. I now see it and use it as tool for my overall health and mental wellbeing.

~Nikki

My Top Lessons of 2022 Lesson #8: Fall Out of Love

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A letter to myself.

Dear Nicole,

Please hurry up and fall out of love with things and people that do not love you like you need to be loved. When I say things, I mean habits and ideas or ideals that no longer serve you. And especially, the ones that never served you in the first place. These things are holding up your progression. When I say people, I mean friendships and relationships. Fall out of love with the need to belong to a huge group of “girlfriends”. Please hurry up and fall out of love with that deep down inside longing to be accepted by your religious peers. It’s your need for acceptance stemming from childhood that keeps you bound. You oblige yourself to people that do not want you or really like you. AND you know it because you FEEL it.

It may be easier to say never fall in love with someone who doesn’t love you but, you may be the one that develops feelings first and the other person does a little later. But once you realize that the love is not there or doesn’t reciprocate in the manner designed for you, fall out of love with that person. Walk your feelings back. Pull back and pull off. As a friend once told you, “Put your heart in your pocket and not on your sleeve.” It is okay to and necessary for your growth and progression to fall out of love with things and people that do not love you. You can operate in a love for mankind for those people. A “Godly” love.

With Unconditional Love,

~Nicole

P.S. You cannot make deep connections where there are puddles in people. -Nicole Jackson

My Top Lessons of 2022 Lesson #7: Knowing is Half the Battle

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“All things are already in divine order.” – The Sacred Yes, Deborah L Johnson

As a child, I watched the cartoon G.I. Joe and at the end of the show he would always say, “Now you know. And knowing is half the battle.” There will be times when you are going through something extremely challenging and difficult. It can be dark. It can be so dark you can’t see your hand in front of you. It can be so dark; you can’t see or find your way out. It can seem like you are going to be stuck in this state forever.

G. I. Joe would review the episode, point out significant things, and tell you the lesson of the episode. This is how he poured knowledge into you so that you may have it in battle. You can have a one up, a two or three up, just by KNOWING some things and bringing those things into remembrance. In my religion, the Book of Isaiah 43:26a says, “Put Me in remembrance”. It has been suggested that when you can’t remind yourself of the truth, facts, affirmations, knowledge, you can ask the Holy Spirit to put you in remembrance of what is true or what you know. Basically, you ask for a reminder from a Higher Power.

I experienced more anxiety and more depression, with greater intensity this year than I can recall. In some of those times, I did not remember the truth about my situation or my feelings. I was overcome with those two things that the Spirit whispered, sleep. Sleep was my affirmation. It was my scripture. It was my escape. It was my knowledge.

However, for the times I was aware of the battle I was in, I sought the Lord. Some may think this is about Christianity and the Bible. You are partially correct. However, to seek what is Lord or who is Lord is to seek something or someone that can give you something to assist you in battle. No matter what your battle is. To seek the Lord is to seek answers. You want to get an understanding. You need some knowledge. You need some wisdom in battle. You need to remember so that you can know!

I sought through prayer. I sought by reading. I sought by searching affirmations and meditations for what I was going through. I searched Google and YouTube for CREDITABLE sources to find out more about fears and phobias, anxiety and depression. One very significant thing that has helped me this year when I question, “Why am I or must I go through or deal with this is something that came from the book, The Sacred Yes; “All things are already in divine order.” “When you exercise your faith, you UNDERSTAND and ACCEPT that all things are already in divine order.” What I am going through is in divine order helped me to HOLD ON because I KNOW if it’s in divine order it’s going to work out for my good. If it’s in divine order, I must learn from it. If it’s in divine order, I can’t control it but, I can control my response to it. KNOWING THIS WAS HALF THE BATTLE.

Choosing (making a decision) to have faith, to pray is a POWER MOVE that will produce POWERFUL results in your life. -Nicole Jackson

~Nikki

Sunday Morning Coffee Musings: Winter Cleaning

I don’t know about you but, there’s this energy of tidying up, tying up loose ends, and wrapping up things spanning across many areas of my life. So many endings and an end of an Era so to speak. Good byes to outgrown and outdated traditions in my life. I’m fulfilling my obligations this month because I said I would. I like to try to keep my word. It’s a farewell to people and things I’m “known” for. I feel good about it. It’s been a heaven of rides with some hell-ish detours, yet necessary I suppose. You know, for my growth. Fertilizer doesn’t smell like roses but they do help them to grow.

~Nikki

My Top 12 Lessons of 2022 Lesson #6: Sort, Wash, Dry, Repeat

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I thought I was over it and I thought I was healed. Nope. This year I learned the Creator is meticulous. I learned that CLEANLINESS is GODLINESS. I learned the only remnants that need to remain are ones that strengthen you and not ones that hinder you. A tiny pebble in your shoe will certainly bother you. You can walk around all day with it and be annoyed and irritated or you can sit down, untie your shoe, and shake it out.

How many times must one be washed to remove the dirt of our past? I guess it depends on the depth of the pain or shame. God goes to the innermost parts to clean you and it’s dark in there. You can’t see the dirt so God reveals the dirt through your actions, reactions, and hurt. It’s like something happens, it triggers your past, and boom! You’re angry. You’re sad. You’re going off! You’re shrinking into isolation. Yep. You “may” need to heal some more. That thing may need to be washed again to get the stains out. It may need to be washed again because there is this tiny speck that is hindering you.

The other side of this lesson is there are some things that happened to us or we did we may have to contend with for the rest of our lives when thought about, reminded of, or triggered within. People will keep bringing it up. People will unknowingly trigger you. You could go years and be triggered by a thought or memory. God will help you SORT it all. God will WASH you again with comfort, wisdom, guidance, books, therapy, etc. God will hang you out to DRY so you can return to a new state of being. Refreshed and smelling like Clean Linen or some scented GAIN 😀 And if you need it again…God will once again help you SORT, WASH, and DRY.

~Nikki

My Top 12 Lessons of 2022 Lesson #5: RESET AS NEEDED.NO.LIKE REALLY.

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When you have a week (or weeks) that is seriously overwhelming and you’re on the verge of “exploding or imploding”, one should take some time to RESET and REFOCUS on what you are REALLY supposed to be doing with your life and TIME! Things, life, people, work, social media, will knock you off course if and you won’t realize it until you look up and see the shore of your goals for the year at a distance. You won’t realize it until you are DOING NOTHING you were doing or planned to do.

I took a RESET weekend to get back on course. I extended that weekend to a week. No social media. No running errands for others. I took time to deeply clean my house and spirit. Binaural beets, good sermons, spiritual messages, reading and writing, time in nature daily, and day dreaming was what I needed. I took out my planner/notes and reviewed my goals and got back on track. I detoxed from all of the negativity that was occurring. I didn’t watch the news, either.

So… I need to recognize when things are going off track and I’m involved in the chaos. I need to pull back. I need to RESET and REFOCUS as needed or forfeit my dreams and goals for the year. And that, my friends, is not an option.

~Nikki