There is a time for pruning. There is a time to chop it down. The tree is dead. And once you chop it down, you have to pull up the stump and the roots. Whatever this is that you have been pruning in your life, these thoughts that keep hindering you. The feelings that keep you doubting yourself no longer can be pruned. It’s time for that “thing” in your life to be chopped down and pulled up. You can no longer afford to let it “get to you”.
Chopping down a tree and removing the roots takes a plan, precision, and work. It involves a licensed professional. You don’t have to destroy others around you while you SEEK therapy or read a book to heal. You don’t have to destroy others around you while you remove them or the things they have done to you from your life. When they chop off the branches, cut the tree into pieces, there is a plan, a method, precision that goes into that part of the tree that is being cut so that it doesn’t destroy what is around it.
When a tree is cut down, the scenery changes. Air flows differently. The shade…changes. Sometimes the shade is gone. In increments, your life will change as you cut down the thing that has been holding you back. The scenery changes in your life as you remove the thoughts that continue to grow back and hold you back. And then you have to remove the stump and the roots. The stump is a reminder that the tree was there. You don’t need any reminders. Remove the stump. You don’t need the roots. You have to remove what started it all. You have to overcome the past once and for all. It’s going to take time but, you can overcome it.
The tools I am using to cut down this tree are:
Trust in my Higher Power
Time spent with my Higher Power to enhance my “hearing” of directions and actions
Limited time and conversations with certain people
Letting go of what I cannot control and controlling my own responses
I can’t wait until my scenery changes for good. I can’t wait to feel a new breeze. There is work to do but, this tree in my life has to go. It has to so it can no linger hinder my progression.
“You think you’re better then everyone else!” They said.
“Why do you say that?” I replied.
“Because you just do!” They said.
“You’re still not telling me HOW I am better than you or WHY you think that?” I replied.
This particular person never gave me a clear answer. But, through revelation via Spirit, I figured it out. However there were some that gave me vague answers as this wasn’t the first time I had heard this. Vague answers like, “You’re too quiet. You don’t do anything “wrong”. You are not like us.” So, because I don’t talk loud or I am mostly quiet by nature, I think I am better than them. Because I don’t smoke cigarettes or weed, I think I am better than them. Because I was raised different, not better, just different, I think I am better than them. Because I enjoy the Bible, the Word of God, spirituality, always trying to do right or good, I think I am better than them. Because I mostly stayed out of trouble, I think I am better than them. Because I got good grades, got a little education, I think I am better than them. And the rediculous list continues.
I believe most people don’t think they are better than you and I do think there are some that do! However, you may want to check your REASONING and RATIONALE and RELATIONSHIP with that person to make sure it’s not YOUR OWN INSECURITIES SHOWING UP. You may be just ASSuming a person thinks they are better than you when in fact they are just DIFFERENT by personality or upbringing and life experiences. They may not enjoy being around drunkeness because they grew up in a home where being drunk brought out the worst in a parent. They don’t think they are better than you. They may not be into drugs because of their religion or they hate smoke because it bothers their allergies or they can’t tolerate the smell. Doesn’t mean they think they are better than you. Perhaps you two took different career paths, they needed a degree or certification to be a nurse or teacher. Doesn’t mean they think they are better than you because you drive a truck and enjoy it.
Question your thoughts. Questions your feelings. In families, you have parents telling children that other relatives think “they are better than us because they have a big house and nice car.” Those children grow up thinking those relatives really think they are better than them and it’s really based on their parents’ insecurities and envy. Yes, you may just be jealous. Some children grow up mad at their cousins or half siblings because they had a better living situation or material things than they did. Imagine, you are an adult and still upset that your half brother grew up in a nice home with two parents when that half brother did’t have anything to do ( I want to say sh– t to do with) with what your parents or their parents did with their lives, careers, and incomes.
I grew up in a neighborhood with blue collar workers and white collar workers. I grew up in a neighborhood where two block away there was low income family homes. When we were children I recognized early on that some people had really nice homes that were bigger and better than mine. I also recognized that some of my friends and family were barely getting by. In some homes, no matter the size, there was love and in some no matter the size, type of car, there were some bad situations. I don’t ever remeber being mistreated by friends that had more and those that had less. We just wanted to play. Spending the night was different at everyone’s house. Sometimes breakfast was made by the parent in the house and other times, my friends or cousins would cook breakfast for us. I just wanted to eat and didn’t care if it was served on fine china or chinette paper plates!
I’m done with explaining to people who are bent on misunderstanding me. I am DIFFERENT. They can deal with it because I already have. I already have accepted the fact that I am not like others. We all are unique and that needs to be recognized and appreciated. I never was really loud or wild but, that doesn’t make me think I am better than anyone. I grew up in a two parent home but, I don’t think I am better than others that didn’t have both parents at home. You don’t know what goes on behind closed doors of the houses you drive by. I am a single parent. Proudly and unaplogetically. So, with that being said, those of us that are different from you, with different experiences, different educational levels, etc. for the most part aren’t walking around with our noses in the air. Get to know someone and appreciate the differences and embrace the commonalities. And question your own thoughts and feelings.
Timing is everything. It’s about time and the time is right for a BOLD NEW CHAPTER in your life. You’ve been playing safe. You’ve been dabbling but, now it’s time to venture out into the deep! Don’t get scared now and if you do, move beyond, over, under, and around the fear. The deep is where the treasures are. The BOLD moves is the action that creates a reaction called manifestation. A BOLD move is the move that triggers the waves and waves of success.
I don’t know what you are doing this month but, it’s a blank page. It’s a new chapter. WRITE BOLD visions. TAKE BOLD actions.
There is a bold new chapter waiting to be written by me.
I know the plans the Creator has for me. Plans to prosper, to give me hope and a future.
It’s JULY and I am not going to say “ALREADY” because I am working on enjoying EACH day and EACH month and not focusing on “time slipping away”. Immerse yourself in the day and month and it won’t seem to be slipping away and moving fast. Just a thought.
So, June was what it was suppose to be for me. The energy it gave was the energy I tapped into and at times wrestled with.
Don’t let other’s negativity influence you in any way!
Get ahold of your finances!
God’s perception of me is never clouded even if my perception of myself is clouded and other’s perception of me is clouded
When I don’t know how I feel about myself I need to ALIGN with how God sees me.
Each moment, good or bad, ugly or beautiful, relationships, friendships, family-ships, have shaped me and given me identity. However, is that my true identity? Ephesians 2:10. It certainly makes me unique as we should be.
If I am feeling severe depression, it’s okay to sleep most of the day, watch TV and tell others I don’t feel like talking. Do stay hydrated. Do eat/snack healthily. DO NOT JUDGE MYSELF for having a dark day.
Heal and release self sabotaging THOUGHTS so I CAN BE OF SERVICE TO OTHERS!
Reach for my higher self. It will not always be easy.
The Steele Magnolia tree of the South Americas is associated with Mary Magdeline who was a FAITHFUL disciple of Jesus Christ. She displayed peerless strength during times of struggle.
When I sat in mediation during my coffee time with God I head, “You are a magnolia tree.” So, I looked it up and was surprised to read those things it’s associated with. Then I was surprised that God would, or Spirit compliment me and tell me who I am. We are not use to receiving compliments by God. It’s a weird thing, huh? It is until you read the Bible and realize God has been complimenting you in so many ways. We can say God builds us up through his Word or teachings and that’s sits well with us.
But when the Creator sends others to compliment your character or diligence or accomplishments, we don’t know how to receive it sometimes. We throw it back on the religious teachings, “Well, it was all God.” It was but, it was you, too. You had to be obedient. You have to be willing. You use your personality and character and your individuality in getting it done.
I needed to re-read this today after the post I made Sunday. I also needed Wednesday’s reminder.
Today is that sometimes. We all feel like giving up or have felt like giving in the past. If we are honest, there are some things we did give up on and maybe even ourselves from time to time. If you have been following this blog you know I’ve had my issues with the church and religion and at times with God. Let me back up…
It was an extraordinary week as I was in classes in Jackson, Mississippi learning about God’s Pattern for Leadership and Strategic Planning: Analysis, Needs Assessments, Objectives and Goals. I like to learn. I had very little anxiety while I was there. I know it was because I had very little responsibilities. I didn’t have to cook. I didn’t have to clean. I didn’t have to worry much. I returned home Friday and Saturday evening I partied with my friend and her family at a 1990’s themed house party. If I had more photo space, I’d share the jeans I created. I had a ball. I danced all night and today I can barely move. It’s not just age, it’s Rheumatoid Arthritis and Fibromyalgia on top of that.
What I feel like giving up on today is church. It’s funny because I was so sure of my direction all week. Well, not really but, I am sure it involved the church. Make sure you understand I said nothing about giving up on God. I know I am feeling this because of the conversation I had with a particular individual and after finding out they lied and twisted a conversation we had. This person actually is a pastor I know very well.
This thing I am feeling is temporary. I just wanted to acknowledge that I feel like giving up and it’s not an indication that I will. I think it’s important to acknowledge a feeling and to sit with it. To explore it. To receive what it is telling you or teaching you or where it is leading you. I hope you know that it’s okay to FEEL like giving up sometimes and sometimes there are things we should give up but, never give up on yourself.
Plan it. Do it. Discipline. Via time with God, I discovered my problem is, my root problem is a lack of confidence that stems from childhood. I was made to feel that nothing I did was good enough or right. None of the choices I made were the best or right per one of my parents. Although I have worked diligently through this there is still residuals of it that seep out in little ways. This is why I always say you will be working on yourself the entire time you are here. How on earth will you find time to fix, correct, and criticize everyone else “if” you are busy working on yourself.
Via God/Spirit: I tell you this; DO IT. Do your work and expect errors. Expect people not to like it or to like you but, you don’t have to be defensive about who and what people like. You don’t like certain people and you don’t like what they are talking about, teaching about, speaking of and the difference is you have learned that you don’t have to voice or write that unless what they are saying is filled with hate. I am not of hate, division, or things of that energy. And even then, you need to know when to speak and when not to.
Via God/Spirit: See mistakes as teachers and tools to help you grow. Ah, you are embarrassed and ashamed when you make mistakes. Yet, you always defend and tell others it’s okay if they make mistakes. You don’t give yourself the same grace and mercy. I know. It was never okay for you to make mistakes. And when you did, boy were you ever ridiculed merciless at times. Give yourself the same grace and mercy you give others. I gave you grace and mercy then, now, and in the future. Release that thinking. Let’s work on that.
What you tell yourself or when you don’t filter the thoughts that enter your mind like, “EAT ALL OF THE POTATO CHIPS NIKKI”, the body will do. Explore your emotional eating habits because that is the root of your problem lately. Not discipline. Not because you like food. Why wouldn’t you like food? A tree has many roots. One root may be sugar and salt addictions or insufficiency. One root may be a craving for a nutrient or vitamin that causes you to pick chocolate or ice chips. Remember that time you could not stop eating ice and your iron was extremely low? The nurse called and wondered how you were still standing! It could also be genetic make-up but, right now it’s emotional for you. Explore those things and self-discipline becomes easier.